Closure with a Sociopath. Not Something to Hold our Breath Over.
So many of us crave closure; an apology.
An explanation. An end to the ending.
One True Love Scam reader decided to write and send the apology
she wanted from him, to him.
And asked him to read it to her.
He never did.
Here’s the letter – the closure – so many of us wish we could have gotten. Closure with a sociopath is something we have to find on our own. This is written by a young girl to the scammer lying sociopath who hijacked her. Here’s what she wrote for herself to free herself with the apology a sociopath will never give – if they do – they’re lying.
Dear E, I am so sorry for the pain I caused you. I did not think of the consequences to you from my actions and my choices. I could not lose your help, so I kept hiding secrets to keep you around. I am sorry. I thought you would never know certain things and that it would be enough for you to be happy. I am sorry I pushed this too far.
I apologize for everything I did and still do to you.
I apologize for hiding that I had a FB account, the 1st lie you found out and forgave.
I apologize for rejecting you many times as a friend on my FB after you found out.
I apologize for hitting on Sandra in front of your eyes and for not admitting it.
I apologize for asking you for money.
I apologize for promising I would pay you back when I knew I would never do that.
I apologize for forgetting your birthday.
I apologize for switching off my phone without caring about you.
I apologize for cheating on you with Pauline.
I apologize for telling her exactly the same things I said to you.
I apologize for making plans for the future with her while I was with you.
I apologize for putting pressure on you to bring me to Europe – and then…
I apologize for cancelling after you planned the trip so I could be with Brie.
I apologize for cheating on you with Ava.
I apologize for cheating on you with all the women I never told you about.
I apologize for making you beg me for answers I should have begged you to listen to.
I apologize for making you look like a fool with everyone who saw me with other girls.
I apologize for not using condoms and giving you 2 diseases.
I apologize for teasing you about your body shape.
I apologize for promising you many times that I would change.
I apologize for what I did with Kate.
I apologize for bringing her to your home.
I apologize for contacting Rosanna and hiding it from you.
I apologize for not giving you the attention and love you deserve.
I apologize for wasting 2 years of your life waiting for love I do not feel and cannot give.
I apologize for blaming you for my troubled life.
I apologize for sucking up your savings.
I apologize for not celebrating your birthday.
I apologize for never buying you a present, flower to show appreciation for you.
I apologize for searching for Ava again as soon as you left.
I apologize for saying that I am single.
I apologize for chatting and for texting with girls in an intimate way.
I apologize for Marilyn.
I apologize for letting you live my lie.
I apologize for not being the man I told you I was.
I apologize for not having the strength to be there for you now.
I apologize for leaving you behind with such pain in your heart.
I apologize for contacting Pauline again yesterday.
I apologize for manipulating you and playing with your vulnerability.
I apologize for blaming your pain on you and telling you that you enjoy feeling like a victim.
I apologize for moving on so fast and so easy.
I apologize for telling you that I loved you.
I apologize for making you fall in love in with me.
I apologize for not being able to change for you.
I apologize for not writing this letter myself.
I apologize, Sheldon
This is the apology letter I wrote to him, right after my break down. I sent it to him, asking him to read it to me. He never did. Instead I gave him another 6 months to hurt me. It’s hard to accept that I still have loving feelings for someone who only hurt me. I think I just need some time.
Thank you E.R. for sharing the rough steps along the way of healing.
Sociopaths offer no closure. They are unable to love and have no feelings of remorse. An apology is something they will never make. They feel no regret, shame or guilt. There’s only one thing they’re sorry for: That they didn’t get more from us. Closure is ours to find.
Time to thrive!
Here’s to REAL True Love and Happiness!
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