Long after the loser is gone we might have lingering fear.
This is the opposite of what we want to be, which is: happy as a lark!
Become fearless and free.
And start singing our favorite tune!
There are two reasons why we might still be fearful: one may be we still know too much about what the nutter is up to at this point in time – the other is not having a handle on what a sociopath really is and what that means – which causes the first.
Go back to viewing the scam through their eyes.
If we know what he or she is doing, where he is, or who his current main-scam is we know too much. If we know what they’re telling others about us this very week or month… we know way too much – Essentially we’re still in contact.
In Contact Leaves us in Fear after the Sociopath is Gone
After the masquerade is over, we’re “broken-up”, separated, divorced – when the initial shock of ptsd is long past, but we have lingering fear we want to ask ourselves – why?
Though we may not be calling him or texting – if somehow we’re aware of his status and actions – sorry to say, but this constitutes “contact.”
We can’t heal or recover while still in contact. This is a roadblock to healing. For super-duper clarity, read here: What is No Contact?
If we’re checking his Facebook page – we’re still in contact.
How Do We Know What the Nut Job Sociopath is Up To?
Let’s be for real’s here: examine the source of the things we know about his doings. Is this info directly from him? His Facebook? Instagram? — If we wanna get better we gotta get a hold of ourselves and get off his social media.
Is the info about him from someone we still contact who has contact with him or her?! YIKES. Why are we still in touch with his “friends”? – Even if they were our friends first – dump them. Block them. Now.
Remove ourselves from his control.
Wherever it is we’re getting news of his whereabouts – end it.
No Contact is about Freedom and Safety
Block whatever that source is in all our devices, on FB and everywhere. Get a new phone number, block his or her number and the phone number of anyone connected to them. Sociopaths always have to move on – and cutting our connection to them weakens their connection to us. Only no contact affects them. They know when we’ve truly cut them off – and they know when we haven’t. They. Feel. It.
Cut them loose. Completely.
In case it’s gone unnoticed: we’re the ones in control.
We’re Our Own Angels
Healing and overcoming lingering fear after a sociopath is very much in our own hands. Find the accurate perspective on the madness. – Comprehend what a sociopath truly is – a being devoid of positive emotion.
We can’t allow sentimentality, romanticizing, or misplaced forgiveness to keep us bound to their harm. Stand up. Take our lives back. Renew. Become whole and better than before. Give this to ourselves. – No one else can. And – we can. We truly are our own saving grace. Decide our lives are valuable enough. Claim them. Be fearless and free.
Here’s to REAL True Love and Happiness!
Time to Thrive!
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