Promises of a Con Man

The promises of a con man are illusion.
A Pied-Piper song of allure.

imagesPromises, fleeting ahead, just out of grasp. — A cluster of bouncy, bright helium balloons floating just out of reach. A sudden prick of truth pops the illusion. Then we’ve got sore feet and a mess of damp mylar shards to clean off the carpet  and much, much worse.

Con men are sociopaths. They all engage ins pathological lying and self-delusion on a colossal scale. – Whether male or female all sociopaths are the same. – The same tiny, inflexible, deluded brain.

Sociopaths Make Promises they Do Not Ever Keep

But those promises. Oh the promises. They are so… promising. Promises inside promises. They’re the answer to our every tucked away or forgotten desire. The promises of a con man zero in and trigger our deepest dreams, they promise assurance of their fulfillment while at his side.

The promises of a con man are lies.
Insert “she” for “he” where ever a sociopaths traits are mentioned – both exist.

On paper the promises of a con man sound ridiculous. It’s the indefinable “magic” of the con man that brings the words of his promises to life. He’s the key to the heart of the promises. The promises of a con man are like the music of the Pied Piper. — Ordinary notes played by an idiot savant of deception that have an irresistible allure, a gut pulling invitation.

We call it Love Bombing.

The promises of a con man entail: A dream home. A dream car. A life of riches. Children. A family. Belonging. The two of us together in everything. World travel. Freedom. Abundance. Achievement. Satisfaction. Value. Respect. Meaning. Purpose. Fun. Joy. Laughter. Protection. Security. Carefree, worry free forever-ness. Everything our hearts desire.

Sociopaths Lie Always – They Recycle Lies

If a sociopath is breathing, they’re lying – and they know they lie and yet – when the promises they make to us evaporate into non-fulfillment, oddly it is sometimes the sociopath who is more upset about it than we are. And boy, can they get mad. For a sociopath lying is normal – they believe themselves a great deal of the time – another sliver of them splits with the lunacy of knowing they lie. They know that all the lovely tales they spin about their past is lies except the parts about hurting other people. Sometimes this drives them mad with frustration – the fact that they aren’t REAL.

Sociopaths build a false history of ruble they haul along
as “themselves” to present to each new prey.

They build on their lies from victim to victim dragging the back-story of each stellar previous hoax and fraud to each fresh one. They magnify any perceived victory and defile any left behind perceived threat. And a threat is what we become to a sociopath after his promise-lies fall through. – Because after enough of  the promises of a sociopath turn to dust we can see who they really are. The truth disintegrates their existence. This gets them really, really mad.


So a con man lies more to defend the false promises, the empty plans for a great and groovy life together. These promises were the shameless and silent barter for what he planed to take. A sociopath works to keep the promises looking shiny and  promising. That’s so he can keep taking while we’re distracted by their shimmery promisey-prettiness. Con artists try to slip away and on to new prey before we notice the promises were empty.

My, what big promises you have, Mr. Con Man!
– The better to distract you with, my little morsel.

With each new potential victim their “story” is altered slightly  depending on what they have assessed their newest target needs to hear in order to buy into them, giving the con artist time to harvest what ever it is he is after.

Con men recycle key points of their story. – They parrot tales of how and why they’re “victimized” as well as the stories of their “success”.

Following the typical 5 stages of love scam a sociopath’s speak of past failed romantic relationships as the fault of the woman. It’s always “her” fault. – She’s vilified and smeared for it. So called “business” partners or associates are also blamed for their trail of defeats. This is predictable behavior in any sociopath.

Sociopaths Pose as Victims

Sociopaths offer  “reasons” for their failures – these are lie-after-lie.

“Romance” and “business” fails.

Family – Her family is racist, so they wouldn’t let us get married.
Her mom was jealous of me. His parents didn’t like me. 
Her son told her to stay away from me. Her sister tried to have sex with me.

Other’s  greed – She only wanted my money. She had other boyfriends.
She said I had to buy her a house.

Their ex’s failings and wrong doings – She’s a drug addict. She is crazy. He’s homeless.
She’s trying to ruin my reputation. She’s stalking me.
She won’t let me see my children. He turned my daughter against me.

Projects fail because – He’s a criminal. He owes me money.
She embezzled my money. He’s racist. He tried to sleep with me. 
They stole my idea. They’re jealous of me. They want ot be like me and they can’t.

Be prepared: the things he or she tells us about the other women
will be said about us when it’s over.
Targets are interchangeable and replaced. It isn’t personal.

Sociopaths Give Themselves Away

Along with the promises there’s a revealing comment that slips out in a quiet and separate moment. These are some standard give-away comments of the blood-sucking scum bags. These things catch our attention as odd at the time, but we let slide because they seem so strange they don’t fit in anywhere. These bizarre moments of self-reveal – the strange moments they speak the truth, may be things like:

All women want a house; a woman will do anything for a house. Why would you want a baby with me, I’m a monster? I don’t have empathy, I try to have empathy, but I don’t. We can stay married, but live in different places. I don’t care, I don’t have emotions like you do. Don’t tell them we’re married; it’s better for business. If you knew the real me, you wouldn’t love me. I love making women fall in love with me. I can make you jealous with men or women. She’s an old friend – who would you know? You don’t know me. 

These comments prick our Spidey-sense — that little tingle, that quick draw of breath, the alert “knowing”. Hold onto that. That is the truth. THAT is the truth. That. Is. The. Truth.

This – these slips of the con man’s mask – these are glimpses into the value of the promises of a con man. This is who he is. Lies. Deception. Betrayal. Ego. Fantasy. Delusion. Cruelty.

Reframe their comments from the mind of a sociopath. Get away as quietly and quickly as possible. Remember what real true love is all about. But not yet! Hold off on dating for a good long while. Do things we love. Be all about ourselves! Surround ourselves with family and good friends!

Here’s to REAL True Love and Happiness!

Time to thrive!

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