Dating after dating a sociopath…?
Dating after a socio-freak is best delayed.
Normal dating and normal break-ups are tricky –
But that mess wasn’t even a relationship – it was a robbery.
Dating after dating a sociopath is a serious undertaking. You may not like hearing this, but here’s the thing: Don’t even think about dating for a year after an entanglement with a sociopath. They can smell the scent of our vulnerability a zillion miles away. Really. Other sociopaths will be drawn to us. Give ourselves a break. Take time to heal. Recover. Mend.
For a good long time after a sociopath it’s as if we’re wearing a neon sign
“Take a bite and pass me around. Seconds available.”
Understand we were hijacked – this wasn’t a relationship. We need time and the accurate perspective to successfully go through ptsd – it is unavoidable – just like say — falling and cracking our knee – it needs to heal. The fall and the slam into the sidewalk are the trauma – after the fall comes the – inescapable, unavoidable, mandatory time to heal. – Until we’re healed from the aftermath of time with a sociopath other bandits: sociopaths, malignant narcissists, abusers and users of all sorts will sniff us out. They’re vultures. And we certainly don’t want to find ourselves back in love with a sociopath: check these 13 red flags for signs if we are dating – but until we’re 100% – that’s like using the “pull out” method. Dating abstinence is 100% for us until we are.
Dating after dating a sociopath is best deferred… really. – If we were married or together a long time, or had a severe experience with a sociopath – if a divorce or annulment drags out or other complications kept the saga alive – think about a dating break of 1 to 2 years from the time the annulment or divorce papers are finalized and the legal connection is ended or that last drama is over.
We all know what to look for when we do start dating. We always did.
Once we have divorce papers celebrate a job well done! – Celebrate with friends and family. Actual friends – not “friends” who are interested in us sexually or romantically. – Not even that really nice guy from work who “understands.” – Not even that really nice woman who has been through her own bad divorce. Take a dating hiatus and focus on us for a good solid year. Sorry to say it, but – dating after dating a sociopath requires a breather. Dating again earlier than a year after dating a sociopath guarantees disaster. It’s been proven by so many of us. Please. Don’t date.
If there’s even one tiny thing from this website that supported you in your escape,
trust that this is accurate as well. Hold off on the dating scene.
Every sociopath can sniff us out right now as vulnerable and a candidate as their new and juicy prey. And they won’t have to work as hard. We’re already broken in. Dating after dating a sociopath brings a high-high chance of running into the same kind of relationship with out complete healing first. Dating after dating a sociopath is a sure way to trouble – if we don’t give ourselves enough time to get back to us!
Stick close to those we know – Stick near those who love and support us. This means family and long time friends. It could mean spending time with others who have dated a sociopath in support of one another. Anyone who judges us is someone to avoid. It’s time to be surrounded by love and trust. It’s time to regain trust in ourselves and feel good in trusting others. We’ve been through acres and gallons of betrayal. Reframe that dark chapter. Take care of our spirit. Take care of our health. Build a great future!
Stay away from dating websites.
Internet dating sites are a haven for lying sociopaths, bad boys and serial daters.
Even if another sociopath doesn’t latch onto us, if we’re dating too early after dating a sociopath, inexplicable arguments will be the keynote. Tears, confusion, heart wrenching senseless conflicts will occur – everyday. Not kidding. Give ourselves the nurturing we need. Spend time with old-old trusted friends and family. Date ourselves. Do things we love. Learn something new. Start a new adventure with ourselves.
Remember who we are.
It’s a great time to open our hearts to ourselves. There’s a writing exercise for opening up to our buried dreams. An awesome way to get us remembering how unbelievably super-great we are. To get to what makes us happy.
It’s so simple. Take a blank piece of 8×10 paper, a pen and a quiet moment for yourself. In the center of the paper write two little and oh-so-big words: I am. You might like: I dream of. Or do both. Or whatever comes to you. Or even a color, like : yellow.
Then write down every word that comes to your head as you feel them, as they come to mind. Let the feelings and words come tumbling onto the page. Spelling or “correctness” of any kind isn’t a consideration – it has no importance. Let go. Let it out.
At a sudden moment you’ll feel a shift. You may have a rush of something to write down. It may be a poem, a story, a memory, an ode to you.
Feels amazing doesn’t it? That’s because we’re each Amazing!!
Other rediscover-ourselves techniques are in The Artist’s Way. A book about healing creatively. Healing inspiration. Positive healing. – Healing to come back to ourselves. It’s not a book focused on those who have been through PTSD, or trauma or grief, but just the ordinary dings and dents we all run into in our lives. That’s good, because we aren’t only this traumatic experience – we’re regular people who happened to get our lives hijacked. – It’s a gorgeous uplifting book. It holds much, much rejuvenation and encouraging glimpses of ourselves. It’s an opening to trusting ourselves and life again.
Here’s to REAL True Love and Happiness!
Time to thrive!